Monday, September 10, 2012

The Seed of Anger

       Anger is perhaps one of the most complex of human emotions. Tich Naht Hanh compares it to a Tiger we have to tame. The Buddha compared it to grasping a hot coal. Famous proverbs tell us that anger is like a fire that spreads and spreads until it burns everything in sight. But, what is anger really? The dictionary defines anger as: A strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure or hostility. Sometimes it seems that the whole world is angry.
       At the coffee shop in the morning we are angry about the long line. On the subway we are angry about the commute. At our jobs we are angry about the amount of work we have. At home we are angry....why are we so angry? I once read that anger is a blanket for hurt. Under anger lies hurt, betrayal, sadness. This was the only explanation that made sense to me. We are angry because we are hurt, or we've been hurt, or we don't know how to sit with our hurt. It's too painful to sit with so much pain and so we get angry.
      How do we remedy our anger? We care for it. We sit with it and we observe it. We look deep into the eye of our anger and we hold our gaze there. If there is one thing we don't do, it's feed our anger. But we do hold it. Anger, how are you today? Why are you so angry? You are sitting there brooding like a baby. Come out into the sunlight and be present. Anger, you can't stay angry forever.
       Anger is a closed flower and we must give it sunlight and water so that tomorrow on line in the coffee shop, on the subway, at work, at home we can smile in the face of it, we can cradle our hurt and dissipate this feeling of anger.